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Saturday, March 13, 2010

The scatological dissemination society




The scatological dissemination society

The science derives from the Greeks (σκώρ "feces" & λογικός "the study of reasoning").

In considering this important strain of scientific understanding lets take for instance the story of Troy or the exploits of Alexander the Great, as examples of how scatological droppings can spread all around the world. In reality they were a rampaging bunch of barbaric invaders who raped and pillaged, but if you read their literature, they are reconstructed as legendary heroes. Similarly, the Romans carried on the tradition, along with every other Empirical regime since and if the Nazis won the second world war, we would be up to our ears in their brand of pooh. Currently the new crop of beefcake paddies are being spread by the Americans in conjunction with their coalition of comrades in arms and the trails all seem to lead back to the Pentagon, or associated agencies. The heaviest deposits seem to accumulate around technology centers and if you are seeking some specimens they won't be far from a computer or the media based service providers.

Now while this brand of anthropological data has been used efficiently to keep the average Joe Blow up to date with what is expected of them to know, it is getting a little long in the tooth and it might be time for those in the industry to reconsider the way they go about their "science". What with the invention of all the mod-cons we the people have at our disposal, like flushing toilets etc, we can learn to analize the stools for ourselves and a new era of freedom from the muck spreaders can be achieved.

So, it is with great respect that I propose the end of the scatological dissemination society and the beginnings of a new way of understanding how the Great Apes go about their buisness.

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